You'll Never Guess What I Just Heard
by TwoDramaNerdsInABoat
Summary: Alex has just outed himself to the entire school in an argument with Aaron. Rated T for some gay slurs and the f-bomb. A little sad at points but all happy endings!


_A CONVERSATION HEARD IN THE HALLS OF REVOLUTION HIGH_

"You'll never guess what I just heard."

"Oh yeah? Try me."

"Alex was talking to Aaron Burr, and he let it slip that he was gay."

"GAY?"

"Well, bi, whatever the hell that means. I just know he sounded hella gay, and now Laurens thinks Hamilton might be interested in _him._ "

"Wait- _Laurens_?"

"Laurens."

"Laurens."

"Yeah, Laurens. He's a total fag, but it's okay 'cause now we don't have to worry about him trying to get in our pants, 'cause he's totally after Alex, and they're _sooo_ gay for each other."

"I don't see it."

"What?"

"Laurens, the star of the football team, a fag? No way. Like, what the _hell_ you smoking?"

"Listen, John Laurens is _also_ part of that gay club, and the art club. Is it so hard for you to believe that he's gay?"

"Okay… but _Ham_."

"The dude's completely gay. Like, he took creative writing. _Fucking creative writing. Because he wanted to._ And he's in all the honors classes."

"Just 'cause he's a nerd doesn't mean he's gay. And not for _John_ , of all people."

"I'm just saying it 'cause it's _true_."

"Fine. I believe you."

"Really?"

"Nah."

 _A SCENE FROM THE HALLWAYS_

Two boys standing outside of the lockers, speaking in hushed tones. Burr says something, and Hamilton's eyes widen. He shouts something unintelligible at Burr, and Burr shouts back. They have an audience now: everyone has stopped their previous actions to watch the New Kid and the famed Boy With No Opinions have a throwdown.

"FUCK OFF HAMILTON."

"I THOUGHT YOU SAID TO BE QUIET BURR," shouted Alexander.

"FUCK YOU HAMILTON."

The argument continues, and that's when he says it.

"STOP BEING SO GAY HAMILTON."

"THE WORD IS BISEXUAL BURR, GET A FUCKING DICTIONARY."

The hall goes silent as the redhead realizes what he's just admitted.

"Shit…"

Alexander Hamilton is bi.

Alexander Hamilton is bi.

Oh, what a turn of events this is.

 _A TEXT MESSAGE SENT FROM JOHN TO ALEX AT 12:00 P.M. (MIDNIGHT)_

 **tuuuuurtles:** alex… i sorta like you

 _A TEXT MESSAGE SENT FROM ALEX TO JOHN AT 12:31 P.M._

 **ham-man:** i know.

 _A CONVERSATION HEARD IN THE HALLS OF REVOLUTION HIGH_

"You'll never guess what I just heard."

"Fuck, is that you again Samuel?"

"Yeah. Just… listen. I have more dirt on the gays."

"The… what?"

"It's the name I've given to the Laurens and Hamilton situation."

"I see?"

"Why was that a question?"

"Nevermind. Go on."

"You see, I have intel that John professed his love to Alexander the other day, and now I'm just waiting to find out what Alex said back. You know, because he dumped Eliza."

"WAIT."

"What?"

"HE DUMPED ELIZA?"

"Yeah…"

"ELIZABETH SCHUYLER?"

"Yes. He dumped her once he outed himself. Maria ain't happy about it that's for sure, but hey, I heard she's gay too, so maybe she can find a way to get in Eliza's pants and the both of them'll be happy or something."

 _A_ _CONVERSATION HELD OVER THE PHONE BETWEEN PEGGY AND ELIZA SCHUYLER (TRANSCRIBED)_

Peggy: He's just a boy, 'Liza. Don't let him break your heart.

Eliza (through muffled tears): I… you… listen Peggy, thanks for your input. But I just want to be by myself right now.

Peggy: Okay, but who knew Alex would be gay-?

Eliza: *weeps* Bi.

Peggy: Fine, _bi_. Who knew that he would end up with Laurens? It's not your fault, and it never was. Sure, he's cute, but he's a total shithead and if he is unable to see that you are the SWEETEST FUCKING PERSON IN THE WORLD than I can kill him for you, 'kay?

Eliza: Peggy… murder's illegal…

Peggy: Fine. I'll get Angie ta do it for me. That way, least favorite sister gets jailed. Okay?

Eliza: Peggy… you aren't exactly helping…

Peggy: Jesus Christ… listen 'Liza, I'm sorry-

Eliza: *ends call*

Peggy: 'Liza? 'LIZA?

 _ALEX POSTS A PHOTO ON INSTAGRAM_

 **Photograph:** /alex is in the library making a shrugging motion at the camera/

 **Text:** welp… accidentally came out to the entire school. Oops?

 _A CONVERSATION HELD OVER THE PHONE BETWEEN JOHN AND LAFAYETTE_

John: Laf. He said he knew. HE KNOWS LAF. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?

Lafayette: What the hell you mean he fucking knows? LE PETIT LION KNOWS?

John: HE KNOWS LAF HE KNOWS.

Lafayette: AND WHAT DID THE CUTE LITTLE CONNARD PIECE DE MERDE SAY ABOUT THIS?

John: HE JUST SAID THAT HE KNEW I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO LAF.

Lafayette: LISTEN HE JUST BROKE UP WITH ELIZA SO THIS COULD OR COULD NOT BE THE OPPORTUNITY OF A LIFETIME.

John: YOU MEAN I SHOULD DO IT?

Lafayette: HELL YES JOHN. MAKE ME PROUD.

John: *excited squealing*

Lafayette: *excited squealing*

 _JOHN LAURENS LIKES ALEX'S PHOTO ON INSTAGRAM_

 **3**

 _JOHN LAURENS COMMENTS ON ALEX'S PHOTO ON INSTAGRAM_

 **Text:** so… bi, huh?

 _ALEX RESPONDS TO JOHN'S COMMENT ON INSTAGRAM_

 **Text:** ha. yep. officially part of the gays.

 _A CONVERSATION OVER TEXT BETWEEN MARIA AND ELIZA_

.mareeea: hey e.

lovelylizalady: Hey Maria.

.mareeea: bfs suck don't they?

lovelylizalady: I am going to watch that bastard burn.

.mareeea: i… c

lovelylizalady: Yep.

.mareeea: so… are you looking for a gf by any chance?

lovelylizalady: Do you mean what I think you mean?

.mareeea: jesuschristareyoustraight

lovelylizalady: I'll go out with you Maria. Just help me break Alex's spirit first, okay?

.mareeea: 3

PEGGY: u realize thus isa group chat rght? Anf what hapened tp not wnating to kill alex?

 _JOHN RESPONDS TO ALEX'S COMMENT ON INSTAGRAM_

 **Text:** don't worry. your in good company.

 _A CONVERSATION HEARD IN THE HALLS OF REVOLUTION HIGH_

"You'll never guess what I just-"

"Seabury, for the last time, fuck off."

"No no! You'll want to hear about this!"

"Do I though? Really?"

" _Yes_. Anyways, turns out Alex has an Instagram and so John made a comment on it about their complete GAYNESS and now the two fags are officially gay for each other and-"

"Samuel?"

"Yes?"

"Shut up. Please." 

_A SCENE FROM THE HALLWAYS_

Voices whisper and faces turn towards the double door to the school as John Laurens and Alexander Hamilton, the artist and the author, walk hand-in-hand to their first-period class. Words 'fag' and 'pussy' and 'dicksucker' fill the school temporarily wherever they step, but neither boy notices. The two have eyes only for each other. Alex says something and John blushes, gaze dropping momentarily to his feet. Then the two continue their regular conversation and go on to biology.

After the fuss over Alexander and John has died down and the hall has almost quieted, another young couple enters the school. A girl wearing a blue summer dress gives the girl in the ratty red sweatshirt a quick kiss on the cheek before embracing her right there in the open, in front of everyone. Someone takes a picture. Eliza and Maria know that this will be on some social media platform or another later, but neither cares. They know that soon the gossip will die and the mean remarks will end and all of the haters will stop, and so they will walk through the storm to get to their clear blue sky, if that is what they must do.

 _A CONVERSATION HEARD IN THE HALLS OF REVOLUTION HIGH_

"You'll never guess what I just saw."

"We all saw it Seabury. We all know."

"Oh. You do?"

"Yes, Sam. We're not blind."

"Well…"

"I think they look cute together, Sam. And no one cares about your opinion, you know?"


End file.
